One of the many lesson that came through my separation was that… I do not have control on anyone else but myself. I can only control my emotions, my thoughts and my actions. I asked God for comfort and released my situation to him because that’s all I could do. Releasing the situation was my epiphany moment, when it hit me, I felt relieved and could breathe again.It did not matter how much I wanted to take control of the situation, fix the problems, we are just not capable of such responsibility & we all have a journey we must go through individually. Of course, this may be very difficult for a marriage but we all have our own journey we must go through.
Let Go Of What You Cannot Control
Understanding that this was our moment to grow, I decided to view it as part of our purpose. I can’t say it’s been easy and that those moments of pain do not come but because I decided to take this time to start treasuring myself, loving myself, pretty much remembering what I love and what brings me joy because after marriage and kids we tend to forget those little things that are so meaningful and I want to be able to give that joy, excitement about life, happiness back to my children and my husband because in the end you can’t give what you don’t have.
Many of the tools I’ve used are books, audios, inspirational YouTube videos, playlists, e-courses and workshops. Focusing on learning has been an amazing distraction. My mind is growing, my beliefs are expanding and this is only because learning became one of my way of self-love (I should also say dancing makes me feel alive so I definitely have added some dancing as one of my tools).
I decided that I would not accept hate nor anger in my heart and that I would bless our situation. I do not see divorce in my future and dating my husband again has been fun, awkward, exciting, strange, peaceful, yes very weird. I can’t say that this is everyone’s outcome falling back in love, treasure each other again but when you decide to view the problem and still give love you allow yourself to be vulnerable in this difficult time which can be what helps you start your own self-love journey, start the healing process and even get clear on your life purpose.